Write to Choose You
This Valentine's Day stop looking elsewhere for the love you deserve
Hello Dear One,
For a long time, I behaved a bit like a sub-character in someone else’s movie. And, to be honest, not even a cool one.
I was in my mid-thirties, single, and wondering why everyone else’s life had suddenly moved on. The future felt uncharted and, though I had the most wonderful friends, very lonely.
Instead of taking control and asking myself what I actually wanted I distracted myself with work and numbed my feelings.
I felt like life was happening to me and waited, I think for someone to rescue me.
That person, in the end, was me.
And here’s the thing: no one teaches you to choose yourself.
To start making decisions that feel good to you, just because they feel good for you.
Instead we have a culture that applauds martyrdom and running yourself into the ground.
Yeah, yeah I hear you say. Put your oxygen mask on before other people’s I get it.
But do you? I didn’t.
I used to be so triggered by people who met their own needs because I had no idea how to do it myself. If I needed a glass of water I’d wait until it was convenient. I’d let other people choose restaurants I didn’t want to go to and talk about their lives before mine.
Today, as a Valentine’s gift for yourself, I invite you to make a different choice.
Take the long way home, just because you want to.
Call a friend because you need support (without telling the story that they don’t have time for you).
Buy something new without asking anyone else’s opinion.
When you choose you the world gets your gifts.
And if you need a little more encouragement join me next Tuesday for Me First, a free masterclass, live from Austin.
Thanks for being here and being you.
All love,
Jo